There is a stranger person in my roommates bed...
So I just had this crazy idea, and no it has nothing to do with the fact that they made me take shots at work.
I don't plan to be alive for 2010 so ima say this 12 hours early. Happy New Year bitches
i'm as serious about my hair as jesse from full house.
that is uncle jesse to you, show some respect.
look up what dreaming that you're in a lesbian relationship with a manatee means.
the fire alarm went off. we werent sure whether to leave or turn the music up louder
Postcard from jail please. Reserving a spot on my fridge.
Listen to my proposal.... I feed you crackers while I fuck you ever so gently.
he sent me a pic of his dick and balls out with sunglasses over them like a face. i was at dinner.
do you still have it? i kinda want to see.
I brought a guy home then decided no. Took him back to the bar and said "I'm going to drop you where I found you. Have fun"
woke up to a family dragging me under their beach umbrella, they poured water on me bc they "thought I was dead" then fed me quesadillas and nursed me back to health... gotta love Cabo
What's Spanish for "I shouldn't have worn these underwear to work?"
I'm actually kinda upset that we didn't consider velcro-ing detachable capes to our clothes before this moment.
Playing pong against a girl who fucked my ex boyfriend so that's how my nights going
she broke the sink..i repeat the sink is off the wall. send help
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