The hookah bar is playing i'm on a boat. I believe in god again.
i stalked him back to the creation of his facebook in november 2008. that bad.
He brought Stephanie home from the black light party. Apparently he has night vision beer goggles
I like when I have the chance to say normal things like 'I know her from college' vs 'I did a ton of blow with her one night at Studio B.'
Should I mail that cop his nightstick or just throw it away?
I love your family. Oh. And on a completely unrelated note, I know where we can steal a dog.
There was a reason God said "Let there be titties" on the Fifth Day.
He took a girl home tonight that he was trying to sell a fridge to. She wanted a fridge and got his dick. He's got a talent.
just in the smoking shack with my sister cheering on a caterpillar make its cocoon
Oh yeah I remember when I first saw Kyler's balls. If there's anything high school swim prepared me for, it's the amount of testicles I would see here
He called me at 4am to ask me to marry him, then threw up into the phone for 10 minutes.
YO I WASNT TRYING TO MAKE A PASS AT YOU.... Or Jesus
just wanted to eat pizza off his dick so he let me and he can never forget it
I woke up on the green space outside our dorm cradling a watermelon and sucking my thumb. College is crazy man.
You went outside, peed in the front yard, and asked me to bring you some toilet paper.
Randomize