Bar closing I am hiding in the bathroom. do you think anyone will find me?
it's like god just wants me to be high for five days in a row. keep the blizzards coming.
i should have probably stopped drinking when my beer pong shots were hitting the other team in the face..
yeah thats usually a good indication.
I'm too hungover to be in a fucking cow suit right now
I didn't even realize you were getting that drunk until bam!
is bam when I fell down the stairs or when I threw up standing at the bar?
Quick question. What's the protocol on going back to a bar after going home with one of their bartenders?
Go back and try to find another to go home with.
This guy just told me he wanted to bathe in bong water with me and then tried to lick my nipple through my bra. This could be love.
I just had cybersex with some guy from the Netherlands for 2 HOURS instead of doing my History project...how's your break going?
I remember trying to cut the power to a house I thought was "too bright to understand the meaning of christmas". Pretty sure I blacked out down the street.
We were talking about threesomes when she went to say who she would have as her third. She did not get to finish her sentence because her bf already said my name.My sheer presence destroys relationships.
Woke up today to the sound of church bells. My first thought was shit the apocalypse, but then I remembered my hook up lives next to a church. This might be a rough day.
His roommates came in and started a dance party in his room while we were having sex. He said it wasnt the first time.
S.O.S. he's talking about horses and breast feeding.
We were basically fucking on the dance floor. People kept buying us drinks. It really only encouraged us.
My boobs smell like weed again. This happens way too often.
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