Bts the comment you were making during that picture was "look we have penises"
Mid thrust he tells me that we have bio together
I think off duty cops drove me home. I may have been hitchhiking
don't judge, it's breakfast wine Wednesday.
It just goes to show you, your dreams can come true. You can hook up with your dads hot married friend.
Did you get any last night. I need to track my forever aloneness
Just because you can put your penis in it does not make it "good stuff".
her mom went out of her way to book us a room with separate beds... her level of gay denial is in beast mode
What section do you want to sit in? The screaming girls section or the "when you guys were popular I was straight and pretended not to like you guys" section?
Thinking about wearing all black to the bar tonight since I'll be attending my liver's funeral.
We were cuddling in his bed and I asked him a question and followed by making a microphone with my hand and told him to speak into it. If he never talks to me again that's probably why.
Also, let me tell you how embarrassing it is to match with someone who seemingly has their shit together at 4:45AM on a Thursday.
My New Year's resolution is to chill out on the group sex. At least with my friends anyway.
The tamale guy is fucking with me, I wanna sleep in he wakes me up; early wake-n-bake and he's late and I'm hungry
Just made a drug contact standing in the sandwich line in the dining hall. Is this real life?
You're my fucking hero.
Randomize
