im at that stage where all she has to do is cough or something and it pisses me off
the owner gave me a free bottle of vodka and a 12pack of red bull if i agreed to leave. my drunken antics are finally paying off.
whiskey dick. though we did manage to break my closet door and flood the bathroom.
I think I'm going to postpone my photo shoot until my Gpa dies. I don't want to be in lingerie and stripper heels when I finally get the call
it felt like i was a kid in an empty playground. i fucked him on every piece of furniture in the house and then when his housemates showed up i was naked in his bed like i'd been there all along.
She is larger then a hippo. You could cut her open in the middle of a blizzard and crawl in like Luke skywalker. Throw a couch and a tv in there and you're set
College: when you have to set an alarm to start drinking
Yeah when I texted her last night the only response I got was "stoned eating cobbler."
Just had sex to Jesse & the Rippers. Can check that one off the bucket list.
You seriously knocked all the beer off the table, broke the beer pong table, broke the bar and kept yelling "you have to warn me first!" all because I wouldn't let you have another four loco
Why can't you just come over, fuck me, then leave so i can get stoned and watch law and order?
I have 35 pounds of pennies. Need any?
Heading there now. Already have a boner.
I'm fucking camped out by the bathrooms. I think the poopatrator is in there. Wtf is my life
Almost an end to the saga.
april was a good month for me, sexually...doubled my number, had a threesome, fucked a girl for the first time and two different boys in one night. there should be a medal
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