just walked into the room and her sister said loudly, "do him, or I will."
There are only two things that should be in vaginas... penises and vegetables
the girl I was having sex with just mumbled victory for msu during sex. i love basketball season
What's the protocol for seeing the two girls you've been sleeping with in the store WHILE buying condoms?
3some
You're right, stupid question.
you pissed in the sink and didnt realize it until it was time to wash your hands
Your dignity remains intact. He, on the other hand, is completely convinced he slept with your cat.
Buying Plan B right after a lecture on feminism. It's nice to know who I can thank for that right.
If anyone could figure out how to pee on someone's soul, it would be you.
You always know what to say to make me feel better.
Good morning! Just thought I'd give you my yearly reminder that we lost our virginities 7 years ago, yesterday.
That's the best creepy text ever.
I'm starting to think I didn't bring enough liquor for this family Christmas.
It's 2 pm....
I asked my boss to leave early for a booty call. She said yes. See.... everyone sees it's important I get laid.
I woke up with chocolate melted between my tits. I'd say that's a win for all parties involved.
I told him we could fuck whenever was concurrent for both of us
I can't have the last guy who touched my vagina be my coworker.
you woke up this morning in a laundry basket, only wearing rainboots.
Randomize
