its not facebook stalking, its market reasearch
I love Welcome Back Week...No I wont accept your god but i will accept that hot dog
I need to stop taking drags of other peoples cigarettes, it's such a tease. Like playing just the tip, you just can't
Dude. The walls are totally staring at me right now. I told you this was a bad idea.
And drunk me decided to play keep away with sober me's dignity
This summer isn't about fun. We have to train our livers to survive the next four years.
The best part of last night was the women's softball game on the TV at the strip club
Blonde girl lying face-down, passed out next to my bed, walls are covered in guacamole. College is looking excellent.
First sex of the summer I'm winning 1-0
GET HOME NOW
Oh shit
I promise that I won't shotgun beers with your boyfriend this time, Scouts Honor.
I never truly understood the phrase ball is life until I started having to balance NBA finals and all these men with balls i'd like to handle.
A+ Viking dick
just discovered a semi frightening wound on the side of my head that must have happened last night. if i die of a brain aneurysm, make sure they put "sorry for partying" on my gravestone.
We haven't had hot water in our dorm all weekend. Do you know if there is any other way to wash off shame?
It was a good thing I was on the balcony flashing those guys or I would have never seen her skipping to his car
Randomize
