im surounded by vag. Like smog aound LA, i am suffocating in an atmosphere of pussy
Well, what part of "I've heard she has crabs" didn't you take into consideration?
Apparently one comment in my womens studies class cockblocks yourself for an entire semester.
My parents just suggested that we tailgate the midnight christmas service. this is my gene pool.
Hooking up with him would mean my type has officially become... drug dealer.
The nursing school interview showed me a picture of my passed out during your party. They asked if this was a frquent thing. I told them you drugged me.
let's just skip the pleasantries and go back to my place for pizza and casual sex
Nothing like the It's a Small World ride at Disneyland to remind you to take your birth control. I took it on the boat yesterday
I don't mean to insult you, but did you leave your training bra in my bedroom last night?
We were suposed to have a 3some in their bathroom but it just turned into us 2 making out while he watched like a little kid on christmas morning
Today has been like a snow day for your boobs. No rules, just doing whatever they want.
It was like something out of a fucked up fairy tale. He just crowdsurfed over to her while riding a keg, said "come sail with me", and then the crowd carried them off into the night. What.
Finally hooked up with her. She bought me tacos after because "she can do better in a bed". You're gonna be my best man.
Sorry for peeing on you and your bed last night.
If you think I'm not petty enough to drive to your house at 3 in the goddamn morning just to punch you, you underestimate me.
Randomize
