I was just standing there and then BOOM! She was attacking my face with her mouth.
I don't get it, man. She treated me like a sexual predator but treated you like a piece of meat.
I cant. I'm trying to smell my vagina.
i do not condone bathtub ky wrestling
Brutally Honest is my real middle name, Princess just sounds better.
what the fuck a piece of candy corn just came out of her nose
I've had more sex in the two weeks since we broke up than I ever had in any two weeks we were together.
seeing two hook-ups in tagged in the same picture will send chills down anyone's spine.
so I was at the house for 3min to grab my bathing suit & tequila. You know, the go-to weekend combination
My cock is literally on the edge of falling off. Fuck Vegas.
We were debating whether you had hooked up with him. I was right for the record.
struggle bus is officially taking me on a road trip to hell. If this is just the first destination, I'll jump out the fucking window.
I needed to bring way more fireball to class to match this professors intensity
How many fucks given?
0.12846
Slept with the roommate last night and also discovered that she believes in eugenics. I may need to slow down my drinking
Would you laugh at me if I told you I think I burned my nipples?
Randomize
