In an effort to go green, I just used rainwater to fill my bong.
watching my parents drink 4 loko out of usf cups playing pool and rocking out to ACDC...
Can I come live with you?
not sure how we got back down, broken rib says we didn't use stairs
oh god...if the people that live above me killed themselves again then im gonna assume im the worst neighbor ever
he fell asleep like an hour after we got to the beach, he deserved that penis shaped sunburn.
i'll probably be on drugs forewarning
forewarning i'll probably have done those drugs with you
He literally chugged a bottle of wine in under 2 minutes. Stood up, said "fuck what ya heard" and stabbed the bottle into their drywall.
Best part of Friday afternoon drinking? Having ping pong balls thrown into my cleavage.
there is vomit in the pocket of my dress coat. i remember thinking "this is a weird place to puke" at some point in the evening, but i dont understand how i did this.
Jenna, I'm going to use all my homosexual powers to steal him from you
Austin, I will climb on top of your shoulders and slowly suffocate you with my vagina
Spending the night with him made me realize that stupid people both irritate and fascinate me, so I'd say it equaled itself out.
He called my vagina "the man cave", and I found it charming
That was the first time I ever heard of a female getting road head while driving... thanks for the memory and making me happy ending..
Nothing like a near-death experience to start off your Thanksgiving...
oh, he’s out of jail btw. as of about 6pm. one of his customers bonded him out apparently lol
Like he really got a coke fiend to bond him out?
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