Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
if i could have babies with my dog i totally would cause i know thay would be fucking hott babies.
how in the hell can u get pulled over when ur car is parked.
Being college poor has reached a new low. I am giving up on masturbating so i can save money on toilet paper
so i made out with some dude last night at the bar. and some girl just stood there and watched. i felt bad so i made out with her too. She looked like she felt left out.
We found her naked passed out on the bathroom floor. She didn't even make it to the shower. She was clutching the bathroom rug.
Oh and probably wearing a life jacket instead of clothes didn't help things either
Drunk. The frashmen love me. Give them. Toilrt paper. And shiots
Dude. I have so much pot that i only worry about running out of lighters
I woke up in solitary confinement, wheb they moved me the guy that sold me the pill of Molly at the concert was in the police waiting room, we nodded to each other.
Screw them and thier engaged asses. I've got liquor to drink and boys I don't know to make out with.
when the officer asked him if he had been drinking, he just goes, "yeah, you?" then falls onto the table.
Ugh. The fucking vaginal recession is so real right now.
How long until you're healed?
Physically? A week or so. Emotionally? The scars of dislocating my knee at a frat and flashing my panties to the whole crowd wi never heal.
Yeah well I fucked my ex on a sink last night soooo booty calls for us all
Randomize
