ready 4 sex 2nite?
wow. woo me matt, woo me.
I just spent twenty minutes with brandons dad explaining why head isnt typically considered sex...can we say awkward?
He left the bathroom door open so i would hear him masturbate in the shower to make me feel guilty for not putting out but it just turned me on cause i like guys masturbating. weird?
Just drove past a church with a sign near it that said, "God wants to be your daddy."
9 of the 12 girls i had sex with in college are on facebook
it was an ugly road back then. i'm sure time hasn't been friendly.
I just gave my patient permission to swallow while pregnant. She was so embarrassed to ask...but her bf was really happy with the answer.
i just bought weed at the top of a mountain, best decision of our lives to go to school in colorado.
please visit steve this weekend, he is getting mature and responsible and shit which scares me.
I brought some guy back to have cheese whiz with me. Then sent him home
Was he satisfied?
No, and very vocal about it.
if i'm ever face-down on the ground puking again, promise me you won't try to braid my hair?
All together there was 318 cigarette butts in the pool... And my microwave.
Shit dude that sort of wholesale destruction can't just be done at the drop of a hat
I seriously want to say to him "Do you know how many blow jobs you could have gotten this summer?"
Woke up on the floor with shoes on my hands...I'd say it was a success
He was like low grade Riff Raff, but I hit it. Twice. His grill popped out the second time.
Randomize
