I told her we could go facebook official. If she ups the oral.
dont get mad but guess who just got banned for life from dodger stadium
What makeup look will say to the therapist 'I am a smart, well-adjusted young woman'?
just spent $80 on an im sorry breakfast from mcdonalds for everyone sleeping in my apartment for being a drunkass and locking everyone out of the apartment at 2am.
Should I tell him the real reason I was in the hospital, or should I just keep him thinking the side effect he thought was in for was allergy related, not I just miscarried the child I didn't know we were having?
Haha. I got you. I always pay you back somehow. Do you accept all major forms of payment: cash, taco bell, and patriotic underwear?
OMG IM A TIGER AND I LOVE ROARING
Milk that cash cow for all the shots she's worth
I bet my lungs hate me more than my liver
That's a hard toss up
This guy on Hoarders just said "we're all about 4 or 5 decisions away from shitting in a bucket". True dat
I forgot her safe word. It was a rough night.
like don't tell me my baby smooth vag offended you
you said "it's karaoke night" and tried to use my dick as a microphone
Doing shots with my high school valedictorian. Bucket list
I just bought sparkling water with plan B. I am the most basic bitch to ever exist.
Randomize