I am so horny I keep driving over the rumble strips... best half hour ever.
honestly if we didnt hate the same people we would have a friendship based on nothing
oh btw spread eagle is not an appropriate phrase to use in a scientific presentation. learned that the hard way
so we were having anal, both very very drunk when he started shouting his roomates name
either she said she was feeling frisky or eating friskies..i was too drunk to understand.
in fingerprint form on my ass. Seriously not cool. \ni bruiiiseeee like a delicate fruiiiitttt. Heeeaaarrr the rythymmm
It started out just like any other night: was watching a Zach Effron movie, drinking tequila out of a water bottle. I don't understand how this got out of hand.
I was informed that last night we held hands while puking on the curb outside the bar.
We just have a real special relationship.
Last thing I remember is beer bonging sangria. Dear God.
took some adderal to make my alochol withdrawl less shitty. now im just concentrating on how badly i need a drink
yeah I had to wear a fucking diaper from work home so I didn't get the shitty squirts all over my cars seats it was fucked
He just said "I know you want my cock" and I said nah. I want food bro
And on a positive note i found a list that i made in 3rd grade titled "what to do if you want a guy to like you"
How weird is it that 2 people I've had sex with have the same birthday and they don't even know each other
Do plants get herpes?
who is this
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