Drunk and had dance off with 8 year old. Lost. Still drinking
remember last night when you and I took turns yelling THIS IS HUGE in my dogs faces? I love wine night.
Judging that there's a photo of me getting head while sitting on a graveyard tombstone.....not good.
You should get with him and swear you have to use lambskin condoms. That'll test his veganism.
There's a really old guy here with a really young girl. I'm guessing he has to make choo choo train noises to get his dick in her mouth.
nothing says roomie bonding better than a sunday shroom trip.
I think making out with someone could be the cure to all my problems. That or more cowbell.
I ate shit on a rock, and when I got up this car full of people asked me if I was okay, and I just sprinted away screaming "I am a banana!"
no, you don't understand how much people deal here. All I had to say was "hey lets buy a bag" and he pulled over instantly, then the randoms in the car behind us pulled over and sold us a bag.
so we were doing it and I was like umm hi im losing my virginity can you take off your beanie
I love that there are toys on the counter. Coffee, tea, wine bottles, gag ball, and handcuffs.
My kitchen gets me.
Like either my tits got bigger or I've succumbed to Trumps tiny hand syndrome
I want to ride his face like a jet ski
She pinched my nipples too hard I THINK THEYRE GONE
I TOLD YOU ABOUT GOTH CHICKS BRO. I WARNED YOU
Don't EVER mix a flaming shot, with a Jello shot.. As good as it sounds flaming Jello is not a good idea
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