**** and his GF asked me to give his stuff back, and they would give me a 100. HA, they dont know I have it to charity haha
I am at the point in my high where i now know/understand chinese.
is 1am too late, or too early to make bacon?
1 in 5 deaths i nrussia is alcohol related. GO MOTHERLAND
Penises. Everywhere.
You're. Welcome.
I hope my tampon is in his bed. That'll teach him. Happy new years btw
Well I blew a guy I barely know in full view of a homeless camp. That's pretty tame for me.
ok. i'm ready for you to come back and test the structural integrity of this futon.
That's how I like my men: traumatized and crying in a ball
I woke up with a massive hangover and realized I still had an entire bottle of tequila in my car...so yeah, working on tomorrow's hangover.
I love 3rd shift and working at a hotel I just had a late night booty call while I was getting paid..could life get any better??
Am I getting cock blocked by karaoke? That's a first.
I'm shotgunning a meatball sub and watching flip or flop. i have reached a new level of singledom.
She came out of the bathroom listening to her iPod and crying. Then she started scream 'she will be loved'. She seems to be handling the break up well lol
My one night stand from last weekend is now taking me on a date this weekend. How is this my life?
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