You want to go to a white party at LAX
Clubs are lame especially themed ones. Im not in a fucking episode of laguna beach
this guy literally just gave me a gold star sticker for the "stellar" blow job i gave him. ashamed? i think not.
Just saw the new iPhone. I would totally let Steve Jobs and Jon Ive eiffel tower me right now.
I want to punch and suck your dick at the same time. I don't think we have the healthiest of relationships.
Heading to the gym, the one that guy said he goes to. Already checked online, his class is at 5. And no, this isn't too much after meeting him last night. Stop judging me,
He puked in the funnel and continued to chug it. Who is this dude?
Do you know of any good hiding spots in the Atlanta area?
My cat clawed my face because i tried to give it a foot massage...never doing shrooms again.
To the person who put the glitter on my ceiling fan...fuck you
drunk brunch me or lose me forever
This girl I interned with got engaged today and I'm just like over here taking plan B with my tacos and PBR.
It's ok, I did squats with my bottle of wine before I opened it. That counts as the gym since I won't be getting there haha
Btw. I have a sinus infection from doing cocaine in a portapotty at a Duran Duran concert. So, gimme a couple of days before y'all start the party.
Well I didn't spend $7 on an Uber just to get limp dick
If you really hate him do what I do: give him an amazing night of unforgettable sex then dump him. You’ll ruin sex for him because new girls won’t compare
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