I wish there was some sort of "recently added" function for blackberrys so i could see what random numbers i got from the night before
I just snuked. Sneezed and puked
Emergency need house key where r u I just got shit o n
I am particularly sorry about getting dome in your backseat. And for thinking you wouldn't notice.
Housekeeping just called to see if we were okay bc they came in the room earlier and we didn't move.
Just crossed the line from casual pregrame to public intoxication. Shotgunning in a bus shelter.
She told me my dick looked like a baby seal wrapped in a sleeping bag.
Two questions for you. Did I throw up last night and did we get food or did I dream that..?
No you never threw up but you did force me to take you to wendy's because you wanted "beef and ketchup"
The walls are thin & apartments are narrow so all the bedrooms are next to each other. Our complex could compete in synchronized orgasms.
So I had sex in a bulldozer lastnight now that's definitely a first...
We've been staking out a taco bell for 2 hours trying to find last night's one night stand
They had like literally all the dildos. It looked like a seance for dick. I left the apartment and haven't been back.
we were waffle house and a lady told me her imaginary friend was sitting in the chair next to her. i don't feel so trashy now.
I told him I lived in the apartment beside his brother and he said "oh, you're the girl that watches really loud porn!"
No I come to this class stoned every week. Except last week when I was drinking in class
Randomize
