i don't mind that he's uncut. i like it! it's like a little sweater!
a cock doensn't need a sweater! especially a skin sweater! wtf.
That's like some buffalo bill hannibal lector shit.
I need ur penis! This is not drunk texting, either! This is I need ur penis texting. There IS a difference!
i just googled the alphabet. i couldnt remember if it was jklomnop or jklmnop.
New discovery: conditioner is better for jerking off than baby oil. Fuck yes.
Best part of failing a semester of college: not having to buy books next semester. I can drink to that
i looked up and she was looking over the stall watching me pee and told me to unlock the door. that dedicated to sucking my dick.
can we just pause for one second and address the fact that balls were out last night
Well he can play the xylophone with his erect cock... So he's got that going for him
She's legally too young to drink and was making out with a guy who is ethically too old to drink.
Just traded a sandwich for anxiety drugs outside the club. I fuckin' LOVE this place.
I just want to emotionally destroy him but also find out how big his dick is so this is perfect
Concept: I never actually flirt with anyone, I'm just a bitch and some people find it endearing
I can count on one hand the number of good things that happened over the past year.
Please come over. It's a pajama and burn-2016-in-effigy party
Good news! Blood’s flowing!
Randomize
