Chicken burrito, or no deal.
Is that code for my vagina?
Who the fuck has ever referred to a vagina as a chicken burrito
2 v-cards in one night. impossible is nothing.
I'm pretty sure we organized our beer pong teams according to who's been circumsized...
Well the "Blackout with your sack out" party turned out predictably.
Call me old-fashioned, but I don't think the words, "Finger my ass" should find their way into casual conversation.
Well the weed wore off around 10:30 and then the date dragged on until about 1 in the morning. So I've decided I really need to start smoking closer to the actual start time of a date. Then maybe they'd be more bearable.
For thanksgving we are only drinking wild turkey for the next 24hrs time to strap your balls back on and maybe a helmet
Ps we bought 8 pellet guns just now
..puke & rally mid art final. HAPPY CINCO DE MAYO!
We smoked weed. AS A FAMILY. IT WAS BEAUTIFUL.
he just fucked me for my cheese.
They kept freaking out that you were missing and potentially having sex.. like it was a bad thing. Got fed up with hearing it so i just yelled "ITS HER BIRTHDAY AND SHE CAN FUCK IF SHE WANTS TO!" They gave me unnecessary looks. I thought it was acceptable.
Its okay. I just know how you can text with your hands cuffed behind you back, so I had no idea what "oh shit" meant.
I'm not totally useless... You can use me as an example of what not to do
He adjusted my bra straps while I blew him.
I don't think you understand I turned down McDonalds for you.
Randomize
