I tried watching the view, i got through 8 minutes. That is probably a world record.
They always sound like a bunch of chickens.
There is a girl in bio drinking beer out of a starbucks cup with a straw
i finally found my car by the hideout. it was parked in an employee only parking space with a torn up piece of paper in the back window with the word employee scribbled on it.
I'm sorry about your car but on a brighter note I did wake up in my dorm. That's something right?
Fuck you.
I should probably file for unemployment. Sometime between last night and 4 AM I facebooked my manager the lyrics to hoe by ludacris. I'm just projecting ahead here.
It was honestly the most delicious alcohol I've ever drank, plus the added risk of going blind from methanol poisoning really enhanced the experience.
wait, how does the 20 year old one night stand pregnant girl have a superiority complex?
We're already drunk. 4 hours to go still. And there's a bear advisory. TOP WEEKEND.
So hungover. I'm getting too old for trolloping around in disco shorts going shot for shot with well behaved underclassmen in an effort to lure them to the dark side of alcoholism and liver failure.
with hottub sex, handcuffs, Pocahontas themed lap dances, and eating pumpkin pie off each other, I'm gonna say thanksgiving will be a success ;)
I just ironed my gstring.. this is please fuck my brains out on a whole new level.
you threw me on the ground pryed my purse out of my hands screaming " I JUST WANNA HOLD IT A LITTLE BIT". later i found you putting on my lip gloss.
Smoking a bowl in nothing but a flamingo thong.
I was sleeping and woke up in the bathroom already puking like i slept walk. Perrrrrrfect.
His dick is social distance approved
Social distance approved?
big enough for me to fuck from six feet away
Randomize