they just started talking about wanting to bang stephanie tanner from full house
HOW DID U BEAT A GAY GUY IN GAY CHICKEN?
The only requirement is that his name is Kevin... All other factors don't matter to drunk me. Drunk me likey Kevins.
I drove your lawn mower home. Hope you don't need it tonight. I'll bring it over tomorrow.
When we do our power hour over Skype I'm just going to sit on the toilet so that way I won't have to get up in the middle of it and miss any shots
Well that's the first time I've woken up with wet jorts
he fell asleep like an hour after we got to the beach, he deserved that penis shaped sunburn.
Only he would come to a strip club and talk about an internship with Walt Disney during a lap dance.
yeah...well...life isn't all puppies & lap dances
You thanked me for a delicious cock and tacos...
He staggered in with his pants around his ankles and yelled that he lost his pants
With a butt like mine I'll never have to pay for Netflix again.
It was dumb but not something to force me into sobriety
On a scale from 1-10 how fucked up would it be to buy weed with my fafsa money?
It's a study aid
Last night was a bad idea. I'm hungover and the contents of my purse smell like Korean BBQ.
Randomize
