Admittedly I was a little ambitious with some of the positions but you walked in during the worst of it.
if my vagina gave out awards, he should be preparing acceptance speaches for the oscar, the heisman and the nobel peace prize.
a girl just showed up to class in a zip up hoddie and sweat pants. said she over slept. i guess she got hot and unzipped it , it was only then she realized was sleeping without a shirt or bra.
its 9am. i just got home. spent 6 hours blowing him in a closet last night
she is the kim kardashian of front butts
This will be amazing. Plus he's going to do a line of cocaine off of the other guy's ass.
I'm having a flashback of telling a guy that he was beautiful and graceful like a unicorn while playing shuffleboard.
Like. I probably should fuck him. I owe him for breaking his thumb.
last karaoke night = doing dmx songs with a guy who threatened to stab me. so yeah I'm coming out.
Sex-sore abs and my workout pants have gravel stains on the knees. It's like the workout of shame.
Hey, if I can't get it and you're still alive, can you get the glass out of my foot? Happy Sunday.
Face washed and sleeping pill taken. Here's hoping for a more sex filled tomorrow.
Just do it. I grew some lady balls and did it last year. It's your turn. Time to show what you're made of. Hit it or quit it.
we received free cupcakes at the first bar, and then I at the second bar i hooked up with a fat chick from Cincinnati on the patio.
you win some, you lose some.
Would it be rude to use my vibrator? like he forfeited his right to be mad when he left me orgasmless...right?
Randomize
