hook me up with the drugs dog keep up the good work
I can't make any promises. I've tried my best to stay celibate. But if a guys on top of me, Im gonna tell him to stick it in.
Telling me its the beginning of school is like telling me the crown royal fairy has come back from vacation.
He was making tequila spiked Arnold Palmers and murmuring things in Spanish.
I love foreign exchange students.
And I'm supposed to be surprised that you got another concussion?
Used a cardboard box as a pillow and a towel as a blanket. Its like the great depression over here
I just need three more girls to complete my 'Freak-a-leak' bang list. Know any girls named Zahra, Shavon, or Daronda?
I give you full permission to fuck a rando on my air mattress.
I found my hair extensions. They were in my hamper.
And then my night got REAL pukey
1 fuck you 2 fuck her 3 ur forgiven 4 im breaking up with her
Slept on the bathroom floor again. I hope when I turn 28 I’ll stop doing that
Did you throw up out the back door and cover it with paper towels?
she compared me favorably to her vibrator
which one?
I love millennial parents. One of the moms at the daycare center literally told me she and her husband named two of her kids after batman characters and one after game of thrones
Randomize
