If it were my dying wish, would you come over 2nite 2 save me?:):):) wana come anyways?
Be careful down there, Shane may have pooped on the carpet.
You ever get that 6th sense feeling in your dick like you know its gonna get sucked later?
woke up with the bag of wine duct taped to my shoulder.
There are topless girls riding the lawn flamingos. I win.
We were just talking bout putting on helmets and going fo a car ride just to see how ppl react. I will def fit in here haha
the bruise you left on my ass looks like africa. the other just looks like a hand.
Let's just not urinate on things that don't need to be urinated on
Hypothetical Question: Would you take a cougar bullet for me?
So I don't know, I'm not a doctor, but I might be juggling dates with 3 different guys...
She touched my penis and started laughing. She did the same thing when she blew me.
I tried to flirt with him by saying "catholics are cool" and he handed me a cup of water so i called him jesus and thanked him for the wine
Any sexual interaction is meaningless without pizza during half time.
Cocaine is ok on a cleanse, right?
she is currently in the shower drinking a beer and dancing to a song called "the penis song" my roommate is cooler than yours
Randomize
