Scream out, "Tax-Free dick over here" in the bar. Ladies love tax free stuff
she really just asked how mermaids reproduce.
I looked at him all bewildered and he said, "what? I figured if it was under 30 seconds it'd be free."
She. Own s my pussycat. Roxk it like. The sun hitting the horizon
Want to come over and play therapist and then fuck all the emotion away?
Just be aware that next year I will probably try to seduce you to avoid going to the gym
He woke up, yelled "RALLY!" and then puked in my glove compartment
Looking back on this weekend, I'm most grateful I never brought up with word "toe-fucking" at the bachelorette party.
All I remember is while we were making out M.A.A.D City came on so I pushed him off of me so I could rap along.
But forealz I'm gonna need a solid 52 orgasms so hydrate.
I'm just concerned as to why his penis is two different colors.
Just masturbating and watching Sports Center...is this what it's like to be a guy?!
I'd like to have a moment of silence for all the dicks she's broken off
I fought off a bull with my bare hands while he went off to have sex with her against a wall. I’m more upset about the fact that no one is acknowledging what I did.
saying im screwed is like saying the titanic took on a little water.
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