He asked me If i had cheated on my boyfriend when I said no he said it's like he doesnt know me anymore
its was like we drinking an entire bottle of mystery
I just found a babydoll head in my sink where we ripped it off and did shots out of it.
I've been crying in my room listening to Billy Joel for 2 hours. Thank God Four Loko was banned.
I think showering with 5 people and a half gallon of vodka was one of the best decisions we have ever made.
just printed out my drug dealers resume for him. guess the ecstasy scene slows down when kids move back home for the summer...
Tornado booty call.. dedication
He went to WalMart with $30 and came back with a watch, a basketball and an engagement ring.
My attorney has my name in her roldex as need to hit that. Im gonna win my case
After i finished him. He goes "youre a champion"... Then whispers "forever"
You didn't hold all these dicks to become a party planner!
And apparently I was the one that started the drunken make out session that broke the window
I jumped out of a moving car going sixty into my driveway because I had to shit so bad. It is not a good day today.
Aww well I’m kinda unsober so probably best
just licked the cheese off a burger. that high.
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