i left the bar a little after you and ended up flipping my car in the arbys drive thru
P.S. I can't hear my feet
I was giving him head and when I deep throated him he screamed out "Ohh, top ten!"
Can I get a DUI with a shopping cart? I've nearly hit 2 displays and little girl...
Semen is not good for contacts.
Do you think I could put your penis on reserve for tonight or tomorrow night?
You're making her cookies in enchange for knitting lessons. You will die a virgin.
Today is leap day..... If that's not an excuse to blackout all day I don't know what is
I don't feel bad about fucking old guys. That's what I want. It's what I likeeeeee.
Need your help. Dad's drunk and trying to build a still in the basement.
NM he's asleep in a pile of towels. They need to ease people back into Hockey Night in Canada.
I could go for watching some naked price is right. Looks like a good time to me.
Okay so, sorry but last night we had to put a note on your chest and a key around your neck just so you would make it home.
apparently i came home last night raving about goats and singing songs from muppet treasure island
...and with one comment dissing Hannibal Lecter, I suddenly understood why we never worked out.
I remember is someone saying "I smell weed" and then having a room full of sober high school kids look at me.
Randomize
