the beds are so narrow its like a jenga threesome
If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
I found out his name. Apparently we sat in the shower together and flooded the bathroom.
Because once my penis is in motion, it stays in motion unless another force acts upon it.
And drunk me decided to play keep away with sober me's dignity
nope. It turned out i wasnt the drunkest person asleep in tacobell parking lot.
I cried singing "call me maybe" on the way home from the bar. What the fuck
She told me a motorboat isn't successful unless they come out gasping for air. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED!!!
Look, I'm just saying, she looks like a troll and works indefinitely at a shitty Chinese restaurant, so me sleeping with her boyfriend is the least of her troubles...
Your anal douche was on bathroom counter. Now it's in dumpster. Not ok. I am mad. Very mad.
We watched X-Files, ate pizza, and he played with my butt. It was a pretty standard Monday.
Note to self: make sure the door is locked before the handcuffs go on.
I offered to go down on her because of how impressive her theatre career was. Stop letting me talk to lesbians.
While finding our clothes afterwards he says..."So do we like have to talk after this?"
He was gone when I woke up. But he left skid marks on my sheets and our unopened bottle of Titos is missing
New Rule: No more sleepovers with guys we met on Reddit
Randomize
