I can't wait until weight watchers comes out with a beer
i can't believe you were mixing vodka with green tea last night and enjoying it.
i should bottle and sell it. my slogan could be "green tea vodka. antioxidating while intoxiacting. your liver will thank you. "
She said she didn't want me watching her give me a bj, so she proceeded to make a "blowjob igloo" out of blankets...
Dude, somewhere around here makes 4loko slushies. I just decided coming home isn't so bad.
If it makes you feel any better, i gave her boyfriend a blowjob last week.
oh and then you called a time out with your penis
I've had more sex in the two weeks since we broke up than I ever had in any two weeks we were together.
I'll always be here to give you immoral support.
He left npr on the whole time when we were doing it. ironic that i lost it on the 100th anniversary of the titanic. thanks michelle norris.
Can we put this graduation on the shelf figuratively and go drink
These kids are nice. Shrooms make everything so nice.
Be safe. If you have intercourse with a boy use so many condoms this his penis is no longer recognizable.
It's decided. Tomorrow I'm getting a Big Mac and a Dildo
I would offer you moral support, but I have questionable morals..
My boobs are too perky to pay that much for a car
Randomize
