your butthole totally puckers for the ginge
I've decided to only have meaningless sex from now on.
And what brought this epiphany?
I've decided it's a lot easier to have dirty amazing sex with someone when you don't care about the other person or what they think of you. I'm going to test this theory soon. Will update you later
It honestly took me longer to beat Ninja Turtles: Turtles in Time, than it did to have sex with her the first time we met.
I'm driving to work with an ice pack on my vagina. how was your weekend?
There are empty beer cans all over and the go-kart is missing. I need it for my halloween costume.
she said we were using the spray butter as air freshener
I cleaned out the fridge, had to pound the brews. I am going to be wrecked for my final at 1
don't judge, it's breakfast wine Wednesday.
I deem her datable let the dance of attraction commence
I barely remember the girls that I got pregnant, you think I'm gunna remember the ones that played handball
It was darkish out, I was shit faced, and they should have marked the electric fence a little more clearly. The entire wedding reception saw me run full force into it
We're both clumsy. What does this imply for our kids?
Helmets.
His crazy is a thing to be cherished
My moms new boyfriend looks like Stu Pickles if he was in a biker gang. He gave me free coke though, so come party?
My liver can't handle being unemployed!
Randomize
