Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
we are driving next to a guy driving and masturbating while looking at a naked magazine. I love LA
We each get one free throw up cleaning, no questions asked.
Whoever said drinking more helps a hangover didn't drink 96% of a fifth of whiskey last night. This is absurd.
all her text said was "asdfhdaufhudshfuds" and i knew that meant come over
She said she was an education major and you replied with "oh I'm taking a semester off too". And we never saw her again...
I wasnt that drunk. Throwing the table off the third story was totally logical.
Dude, I'm importing a boy from Oklahoma for my divorce party. It's like doctors without borders, but with dicks.
drunk old tina is grateful for 14 yr old tina for placing glow-in-the-dark stickers on my light switch...just avoided so many injuries
Will you be super villain lesbian lovers with me for halloween?
They way I see it is I've wasted 7 years of having these glorious tits. I only have about 3 good years left before idk kids or just gravity takes over and they don't look this nice so it's basically open season.
It is not a successful senior year unless you show up to campus without pants at least once, right?
Stop calling my penis "Fat Jesus"
THIS IS AN AMERICAN HORROR STORY I CAN'T FIND MY VIBRATOR ANYWHERE WHICH MEANS I LOST IT WHEN I MOVED WHICH MEANS MY POOR VIBRATOR IS OUT THERE IN THE WORLD ALL ALONE RIGHT NOW WHAT AM I GOING TO DO
Sorry I totally pulled a home invasion on you last night
That was super inconsiderate of me
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