i wants your nipples near my face. PLEASE????
one might say we're banned from that church
Ill pay your DUI fine if you just come see me nooooowwwww
no. its 2:30am and im not going to jail for a booty call
Just spent five minutes taking pictures of my hands for some random guy.
Thanks for reminding me why I talk about you behind your back. Get laid.
i will never coherently bang her
Yeudjkisdjxbfceryuj. i love having a qwerty keyboard just so i can do that.
The best time of year to be high is WHEN THE KING CAKES ARE HALF OFF BECAUSE MARDI GRAS IS OVER YEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH
I just remember taking her cat for a walk around 3 am then falling asleep in a slide at the park
I deem it safe for us to drink together again.
They dropped the charges?
Yeppers. Come drink beers.
Let's just say he sent me a picture of his dick and I was more impressed with the collection of video games he had in the background...
I just want to have such an intense orgasm that my heart stops and I die. I mean that would kind of suck for the guy I'm fucking but then again he could be like "I'm that good"
I just ran your car into a ups truck....but on a up note I have a handle of fireball and breakfast burritos
If you can't seal the deal with her, I will. And you know I'll be successful. So there's your incentive
Plus idk what to say. Like hello dapper gentleman will you pursue me in a midnight hangout where I can be choked
Wanna have a sleepover and take me to court in the morning?
Randomize
