Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
Friends are holding an intervention and have no idea this gatorade is half vodka. This is gonna be the best intervention ever.
Dude you just tried to have a one night stand with my ex girlfriend while we were trying to put you to bed upstairs.
but that still doesn't explain how i woke up on the couch down stairs.
Dude we got so high last night. I said "watch this" threw a goldfish cracker in the toilet, and laughed my ass off. We watched the dvd menu for 30 minutes too.
history professor just told us he has magic fingers. i'm going for it.
i just entered cocaine into my calorie counter.
You planned my entire going away party sitting in the bath tub cradling a bottle of Cuervo. You promised me fire jugglers. And a pinata.
I can't tell you what you just drank, that would ruin the point of Mystery Monday.
I think I just sold a snake to a stoned teenager.
We found him wrapped up in a giant table umbrella in the bathroom.
She's got a butler. A fucking butler. Shes like batman, but with a better ass.
Here's how he asked the pregnant girl for a cigarette. Hey yo prego throw me a square. Not joking.
Cocaine and dance dance revolution for 4 hours. I consider last night a success.
Tis the season to play Pocahontas! (AKA: Eat a bunch of acid and run around the yard barefoot, the first person to see the colors of the wind, wins!)
Sorry. Im too sleepy to penis.
Randomize
