There's this guy beside me dancing with this girl with no panties on. When I looked at him he said he's babysitting his bestfriend's girlfriend since he can't come out.
What a good friend
quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
i make out with random ppl when i drink he shouldnt feel special
He left the bathroom door open so i would hear him masturbate in the shower to make me feel guilty for not putting out but it just turned me on cause i like guys masturbating. weird?
The prescription for my birth control just blew away in the wind on my way back from the health center. It's like god wants me to get pregnant
But I love Penises too much to give up on them. My phone capitalized Penises. It's like it knows I respect them
He brought a jar of pickles to the party. So now I've had beer, animal crackers, AND a pickle since noon.
The guy at the bar repeatedly told us he was an off duty cop from out of town, that to normal people would be the time where you stop asking him to smoke a blunt with us
So random question. Does beer act the same as other alcohol disinfectants?
Gotcha. How bad is it?
Well to compare it to something I would say it what's that walls would like inside the primate exhibit at the zoo after a group of monkeys finished throwing feces at each other all afternoon
i keep replaying things i did last night. and remembering new things. and its a constant cycle of torture
They put me in room 420 every time and I take bubble baths and smoke in the room and they bring food TO MY BED
Hey before you quit, let me sell drugs to your boss at least one more time
Where is Holly?
Nevermind. i can hear her having sex two doors down
its not much but to go through all that to ask for half a balls worth of money was so stressful
Randomize
