fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
I really wish I could go back in time to change the course of events that led to me sitting on the internet at 3 Googling 'Traumatic masturbation' while talking to you about failed dates, and running a virtual restaurant in a video game.
I was getting a bj with sports center on in the background
Da na na, na na naa
we left the bar for like 10 minutes last night and moved his car so it wouldnt get towed. neither of us have a clue where it is right now.
I just realized that the music from spongebob is also used in real sex HBO.
We videoed ourselves having sex... I now know why I close my eyes during sex
They're donating plasma together for extra money. Couple of the fucking century.
I have to keep checking she's breathing. This is why we don't drink on Sundays
I feel like wearing underwear would just be poor planning
There's a very real possibility that I'll wake up in your uncle's driveway.
My phone just autocorrected 'vagina' to 'vaginihilation'...when exactly did I need to convey total annihilation by lady parts??
Mainly I just wanna pet bunnies. And purple chicks. Well any color chicks if I close my eyes. But purple if I open them.
Look, you don't know disfunction until you've sat on the john taking a shit and crying while totally sober.
Sundays were made for eating Ramen pantless in bed.
This is the Front Desk Lady from the Saturolite Inn. Your friend is passed out in the lobby. Please come help her.
Randomize
