i just dont know how to see an unattractive person as more than a friend
he fingered my asshole thinking it was my vag...I couldn't bring myself to tell him, mostly from shame for me and pity for him
When you come back do you think I could print anorexic pictures of Mary-Kate?
You kept running into the wall most of the night. When people asked you what you were doing you told them you were the kool-aid man and there was little kids on the other side of the wall who needed your juice
Lesbian chick is doing her presentation on the time she woke up on the dockside still drunk at 7 am. This is why I show up to chinese class.
Also managed to rip my pants and set myself on fire. And oddly enough I'm still not ready to ask for 2010 back.
That's all? I'm a pro at gay chicken. I'll touch his dick, I have no problem with that.
Guess who has two thumbs and just fell outta his car and almost peed himself
Hooked up with a guy solely because he had a chameleon. Priorities.
i dont know how he's 22 and thinks emoticons will get him laid. lady boner just died.
I just love it. It's warm and soft and the rest of the world is so mean. My bed would never be mean to me
Yeah I mean once a gun is being waved around, its probably a good time to leave the party
But the music was sooo good
Well I kept shouting "you're groovy" at him and then I had a 15-minute argument with the bouncer about how many 9s there are in 100... it was definitely time to go home.
You know what sucks about being drunk at 4 pm? Not a god damn thing.
Im sorry for telling you id rather jump into traffic than date you again. I didnt mean to be so rude
Randomize
