I just had a girl text me from knoxville "come see me. we'll go for drinks and I can make you breakfast"
how do you like your eggs?
over tits
its official now. im not pissing on secret service cars with a senators inside anymore.
Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
So, right as I'm cumming, I pull out and go "PYEW PYEW" like Star Wars lasers. Best part is, I missed her completely.
Are you still giving blowjobs?
Who is this?
Listen man this isn't about soccer. It's about America and day drinking... Your two favorite things now get your ass over here
put me on a leash or i'm going to fuck someone
I was in the bathroom puking up mountains of tequila and when he came to help me, I held the door shut and kept yelling at him to let me be a lady.
ripping the fire alarm off the wall probably seemed like a better idea last night than it really was.
Halfway through lecture, some kid in the front row threw up IN his hands. Professor held the door for him to carry it out.
Can we pretty pretty please go to Mardi Gras tomorrow? I promise I'll be a good girl and not puke in a pledges car
I'm pretty sure I just won at life. I touched the bushy tail of a squirrel while he had his mouth full and was digging in a plant on campus. That is all.
First time not coming to this class high in a month and a half, never again will i put myself thru this torture
I woke up under the kitchen table. Andy is cursing out Joe Exotic's name in between heaves in the bathroom. Jay is trying to sleep w/ a shirt tied over his eyes. Lena and Brad braved the sun to go get bloody mary supplies and food. I'd say the Tiger King drinking game was a success.
It was like Strip poker and blow, but with Yu-Gi-Oh cards
Randomize
