; Think of how many worthless people would b non existant if there was no liquor so their parents never hooked up
i turned job hunting into a drinking game..
I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
Did you ever feel like going into a planned parenthood and performing an abortion in front of them?
Umm..who the fuck is this?
Oh shit
you are my new fav person for making him do the walk of shame in pink footie pajamas!
Worst relationship ever. Keep in mind I've dated two married chicks and a Mormon.
Dad's drunk, trying to hook me up with a 43yo, and keeps saying one and done. Mom is on the verge of tears and disowning us. You missed a good birthday dinner.
Dude I am not desperate enough to pay my dealer in change. Maybe tomorrow.
Hey! Where are you? It's Irrisponsible Patio time and you're not here firing shots down summer student's throats
You started sleep walking, went to my closet, tried to pee on my boots, and when I asked you what you were doing you said "I'm talking to these people about jobs"
Please tell your sister I apologize about saying her baby may have beef curtains. That was inappropriate.
You wouldn't eat with utensils. You insisted on making your own spoon out of a bendy straw and staples while singing "I'm a survivor" by Destiny's Child.
There are leaves in my underwear?
I don’t want to brag, but vows, morals and will power are no match for my blow job skills
I cam home to find him twitching on the floor, surrounded by unopened condoms and covered in cranberry sauce (yes I tasted it) while Thundercats was playing.
Randomize
