I'm eating all of the evidence.
bruce springsteen sings some of the most romantic songs i've ever heard.
the hells wrong with u
just used a paint mixing cup as a shot glass. thank u art school.
No its cool, because I bought a handle of tequila earlier, in case things went south
Remeber when I drunkenly made out with him this summer while he was getting bitched at by his girlfriend on the phone? Yeah, neither do I. But I'm pretty sure that same thing happened again last night.
We got back from Mcdonalds and literally 5 minutes of being in your room, you wanted to go back because "We haven't been yet."
Rolled in at 3:30am from the strip club, with all the screaming I did, Siri doesn't even recognize my voice this morning,
So not the biggest tits he had his cock between. He could have lied.
Haha its fine we ask know it. He's still cool thought
Focus on the keyboard man. Focusssss
I broke my heels and ended up on a random party bus where I passed out after a brief stripper pole incident.
That's fine. It's not illegal to bring ham into a museum.
I try not to flex my sex appeal too much around the engineers, it's like feeding bears...always ends in disaster.
Bitch got stabbed in the eye. With a fork. Wait for it... At church. I was the only one at a party interested in her story. Only in the south
How do you say "put it in me" in Spanish... I'm dealing with language barriers here.
hey i'm sure you are probably asleep bc you suck and think sleep is necessary to live or something?
Randomize
