Spring semester is just not the same w/o you
That was definitely a porn plot just waiting to develop...
then she woke up from sleeping for an hour and the first thing she said was "i regret it already"
Just spun two beer bottles and Placed them in my pockets perfect... I feel like the clint eastwood of drunks
Yes i believe i did use that word. It culminated in a man wearing a corset thigh highs and stripper shoes. All mine btw.
i was able to set 4 alarms to make sure i woke up in time for class but i couldnt take the open beer out of my pocket before i did cartwheels down the hall...
You remember the guy that busted in waving a tazer at everyone yelling "get the fuck outta my crib"?
yeah you don't forget that shit easily
We ended up crawling out from our hiding spot and playing pool with him once he calmed down. His name is Marcus. I got his email.
Overall win. We all know who got to sleep on the concrete outside of Denny's with you.
No. I either had a 6 minute orgasm or I had so many I lost count. I'm still not sure.
Yea we just broke up
so do we start sexting now or later?
i made the walk of shame wearing her booty shorts that said juicy on the back. i'm still counting it as a good night
No judgement. Sometimes you gotta twerk on a legends face.
you ran up to the police and said "fuck the police shit we living in hell ". Then you dropped your Margarita and said "Darby Out" lol
Her neighbors? They're nice. Young family. Tried not to get puke on their side of the lawn.
half way down the stairs my legs said fuck this and i just fell the rest of the way...
Randomize
