I've come to the conclusion that if I was an old man, I would perve around in short gym shorts for kicks.
this other lifeguard and I are actually considering paying a kid to shit in the pool
I wish life had little blips of pornography
You should probably wake up already as I have yet another story for you. Teaser? Blood from knife wound. Tequila. Guitar hero. Kitchen counter. Lawyer.
It was so good the neighbors even had a cigarette.
Just think about it this way, every time you work Sunday, it's another $75 and that equals another hooker when we go to Amsterdam.
Missed another period
I almost hope you're pregnant, this is unfair.
Now one day I will be able to tell my children how a drag queen in a gay bar told mommy that bin laden was dead
What was she thinking? I'm not in the business of charity fucks anymore.
thats why a responsible adult always keeps some facial hair just in case they need to shave a hulk hogan mustache for midget wrestling...
Well the term Party is used loosely in this situation. Since it will just be mom wine drunk and us eating chips with multiple dips.
I got asked to "be the filling in a man sandwich." You don't get to pick the club again. EVER.
Whiskey and tits go great with anything. Especially fire.
Which is worse that I came in public or that no one noticed?
I just took a picture of Austin's dick wearing a hat. Except its not a hat it's a DayQuil cap.
Randomize
