What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
Been drinkin since 3, wearing a tutu, how could things go wrong
Next time i try to unbutton my R.A's shirt with my teeth, please stop me
No promises.
At one point we asked the guy to play "the lion sleeps tonight" with his bagpipes. Best version ever.
Just waterfalled in the movie theatre... this is the beginning to a good night
Reason #57 I am going to fail the bar... it's Tuesday and i'm drunk at Toy Story 3.
I'm really tired of your booty call eating my fruity pebbles.
I just got released from jail. still in my kilt. bring pants damnit. they won't understand.
pants will make it better? really?
Now you know for the next time you go in the basement to wear a helmet
He's like Medusa, you can't look directly into his eyes or you'll turn into a slut.
Sunshine is the equivalent of sprinkling whore pellets on campus.
I'm pleased to know that your mom refers to me as "the ass piliager" now
Sorry you had to clean the sheets with your macro notes
Yeah, nothing like barfing into a grocery bag you just put dog shit into.
You grabbed your house keys, threw them at the door and asked, "did it open?"
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