Are we in a gay sports bar?
can we take a shower together?
no need for the romantic shit. I'm a sure thing
I cant watch the real world now after jersey shore. its like trying to go back to vagina once uve had anal
He keeps asking where i got my clothes and accessories. i'm not sure if he wants to fuck me, or go shopping.
And dildos are 35% off. So. Ya know. Savings.
I don't have any bail money, if that's where this conversation is going
You can wear anything you want
So... Naked it is then
If my bootycall doesn't bring over a Baconnator, I swear to fucking God, I'm not letting him in. The hunger is that real. Forget his Persian dick.
I could see myself being this awkward weirdo drunk girl that patted strangers and danced terribly but was powerless to stop it
Um. Did you take a picture of me with a giant dildo after we went bowling?
The guy I hooked up with last night left me alone with his dog AND IT JUST SHIT ON THE FLOOR. WHAT DO I DO
i need some fresh meat. meat that has a license and a job and isn’t a FULL-blown alcoholic. partial i could tolerate, bc, haha, let’s be honest, me likey my drinkies.
sometime during the night he found me in the empty hotttub singing marvins room in only my bra.
He's smoked my weed, stolen my cigarettes, and used my campus cash, but I try to initiate sex and NOWWW he's all "As your RA, that's a line I can't cross"
I’ve developed a strange interest in ear wax removal vids on YouTube. Dear god, I need to get a job
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