I don't think he has that. His apartment was pretty much a tv and a bed. Topless girl calendar and a glass of water to put out cigarettes.
Had sex with the ex last night. Regretting to begin in 5, 4, 3, 2, 1... WHYYYYYYYYYY!
just found his boxers balled up inside my tights, hidden in my freezer. damn i love college.
You stuck your head out the window to puke and got hit with a mailbox.
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
I think im gonna bang this 35 year old at a kids birthday party in the bathroom at this house while the kids open the presents.
She dresses cool and she's mean. And she has fake boobs I feel like I can relate to her on so many levels.
Still stoned. I like your bong. It can stay. No others, though.
I want to get a list going called "D list celebs I've kissed"
I also fell asleep on the side of a tree so like I hit my lowest point there but it was a good time
Not as bad as when you were sitting in the pond getting fed water
The fact that a spice girls song is stuck in my head is a great sign that my decisions aren't the right ones at the moment...
what did we do after we left your crib?
you layed down in some rocks for about an hour, you stole some pumpkins, you passed out and started shaking, we got t-bell, we took you back to the dorm.
Somehow I don't think offering me edibles is what dad meant by checking in on me
They're the hard candy kind!
Dude, I just turned down sexual favours because I need to study... What the fuck is wrong with me?
Sometimes I feel like my vagina has a photographic memory of his penis. It sucks that he got engaged....
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