Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
woke up in a freezing tub of water at 6 am again. probably should stop the drunk baths
Dude, she's just using you for your money, and Cavs tickets.
Honestly, what else do I have going for me?
You make a valid point.
My mom asked me if I was being satisfied, sexually. And then discussed positioning.
And he tried to make it as casual as possible by asking where i was going on vacation while he was poundin me.
Just saw a woman walking a golden retriever and a vacuum down the road. I miss downtown.
No fucking idea. Just paid for my chipotle in chocolate coins, though. Either there is a huge language barrier happening here, or my big boobs are finally paying off.
Protocol on turning down a date from someone in the House of Representatives?
Based on the pics I have taken of hookups while they were passed out or sleeping, I have scientifically concluded that no two vagina lips are the same. They are like snowflakes.
I though us hooking up in the field was your way of saying you were an outdoors person
I convinced every single one of my cousins to bring me a glass of wine. I was the alcoholic queen and they were my subjects.
So yeah, my old kindergarten teacher just asked me who gave me the hickies on me neck.
I'm pretty sure I just won at life. I touched the bushy tail of a squirrel while he had his mouth full and was digging in a plant on campus. That is all.
They were shocked that I could handle my liquor so well. I'm half Irish and half Russian. This is what I'm made for
ugh my stomach is so upset-- didn't get a chance to take a violent enough hangover shit at work
Randomize
