I may be a little high but I'm pretty sure my alphabet soup has only Os in it
We call that spaghetti Os
What are you doing?
High. Watching Billy Mays infomercials...
That guy could sell me cancer.
Did you write your name in the dust on our toilet tank?
My dad caught me fucking in the pool last night. He proceeded to tell me I needed to "quiet things down" while this guys dick was still in me. Worst daughter ever.
I drank all the drinks. And jump off roof. Yay
yeah...that's gonna come up in court
Three Architectural classes: $990.00 Architectural supplies: $300.00 Changing majors and using my architectural supplies to roll blunts: Priceless
I AM AT THE LOUNGE WHERE THEY FILMED THE LAP DANCE IN SHOWGIRLS....IT IS AMAZING
One of those days. Also, your pants are now in my protective custody.
ANNA HAS DISCOVERED EROTIC FANFICTION OF SHARKNADO THIS IS NOT A DRILL
The whole time we were hanging out my vagina was yelling at me like its a real live penis that wants to have sex with us what are you doing
The spirit of America is being too hungover to celebrate America right?
I slept with the Australian in the bathroom of a gay bar. What has my life become.
What's a nice way of saying 'I wish I hadn't fucked you.'
This is the most aggressive rendition of that Proclaimers song I ever heard.
Randomize
