biggest mistake ever: halloween 2009
remember when mike pissed in his pants and then put a double cheeburger in the pocketsss of said wet pants for "safe keeping"? yea drunker then that.
I don't care how hungover you are were not listening to enya
I have an asthmatic alcoholic for a roommate. That can't be safe.
Its like every time I go out with you, it always involves Serbian chicks and taco bell and you always manage to get both all over my bed.
We have a guy passed out in the bathroom with one of our pots. Not sure if he's your friend so I let him be
He drunk dialed me at 2am asking if he could put a baby in me.
It's a fucking menopause festival down here at the strike zone
Nah I've been there. The worst you'll see is some hobo peeing in a sewer at 3 am on a Saturday
Let's fuck under the stars. And by under the stars I mean in my bed underneath my glow in the dark star stickers.
My friend just got engaged and I'm setting vibrators on fire.
Your life rocks...
Woke up in the hospital naked with my id's taped to my chest. Also apparently puked on two guys, two girls and an escalade (at the same time). Good night.
i got kicked out of the casino for drunken disorderly conduct because i kept stumbling into old people and one of them told on me. as the boucer was taking down my information so i could no re-enter i ripped my id out of his hands while yelling fuck you.
When was the last time you got laid?
When was the last time you came home sober?
touche
You made me promise I wouldnt let you play "fuck fuck goose" with a 40 year old ever again.
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