after the cops left he pulled the weed out of his ass and we smoked it
i checked my sent messages this morning and i had apparently tried to text the bar, saying "idk what i drank, do you?"
I'm watching ellen!
just because im gay does not mean you need to notify me every time you watch the ellen degeneres show
she peed on how many people?
I drove to Chevron at noon and the Hatian lady goes "Oh, nothing to drink yet white boy?"
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
We have a guy passed out in the bathroom with one of our pots. Not sure if he's your friend so I let him be
my friend thinks you're hot & wants to fuck you ps i'm my friend
I wanna just rip ass and see his reaction but i bet itd be better to shatter that illusion when hes drunk
I don't remember, but I believe your goodnight phrase was "nice meeting you, thanks for not macing me"
Just sent my mother the text "we need to get our vaginas looked at this thursday". Hows your day going?
YOUR TO-DO SEX LIST CANNOT CONSIST ENTIRELY OF MY THREE BEST FRIENDS
and their significant others
AND THEIR SIGNIFICANT OTHERS
Ugh. I need to go to the store, but I'm too lazy. Whatever shall I do? That girls still passed out. I should steal her car
it looks like a nuclear can of fuck blew up in here
I need to leave my mind and my stupid vagina are having fight over who's right
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