Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
My mom caught just caught me jerking off...in her room.
capt morgan doesn't hurt if you honestly believe it's golden flavored kool-aid.
We're like two naked peas in a sex pod.
She wanted to test if her costume allows her to still have sex in it. It does
ah, there's nothing like waking up to picture messages of a strange man's cock. life is good.
haha, that's fucked up. flacid cock pictures are the mental breakfast of champions.
There's an australian, my relationship has no hope.
Edward fifth and chaser hands
the potatoes in the margarita machine wasn't the breaking point. its when he turned on the stove and put a bunch of bottle rockets on it that i knew the night had prematurely failed
I just found out via Facebook that my old dorm room is now the free condom distribution room on campus...IT'S LIKE THE UNIVERSE KNOWS!
I am thankful for thumbs.
Because without thumbs, we would be dolphins.
Land dolphins.
He gives me the same feeling I get when someone puts a margarita or German chocolate cake in front of me
Well I hate to admit it but at this point I can successfully say i have been pee'd on by both of my roommates.
He forgot how to sit. we had to pick him up and set him down.
I ate all your munchie Mac and Cheese cause you left me on the lawn. If you don't want it to happen gain, drag my drunk ass inside next time
Randomize
